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| Now that exams are over, I finally have the time to blog "properly" again. This week was filled with lots of study in the Science library, laughter over the most insignificant things, lots of meals with Ange, Andrew and Kristi, and amazing grace from God.
Although I am glad that exams are over and that study doesn't dictate my life anymore, I think the inner nerd in me is emerging and (I can't believe I'm announcing this publicly) I'm already missing the Science library and attempting to write pretty colour coded, font printed notes. Some of you may find it hard to understand. But you see, the Science library has been a foster home to me over the last 3 weeks. I've been there from the early hours of dawn just as the sun is rising and birds are chirping til dusk and way into the night and as a result, have grown rather fond of it. I've eaten (illegally) there, napped there when the study was getting to be too much, made funny faces behind librarians' backs for telling me off for whispering on my mobile while they have conversations at decibels that are harmful to the human ear and even developed love-hate relationships with smoker dude who goes on smoking breaks coming back smelling of tobacco and purple shirt dude, who, like his name suggests was wearing a bright purple shirt and would not stop talking about how he couldn't eat preserved mango because he was going on a run later that arvo and would be dehydrated if he did.
As much as I miss "studying" and the library, I am thankful for this break and that I can direct my time towards other educational purposes. Like watching documentaries on Coco Chanel and learning Khmer for Cambodia. Aika and I decided a while back that we would learn Khmer before we went to Cambodia. A few people have asked why I'm learning it and why bother because I still won't be fluent in it come December 19th and there will be people who will be able to translate for us. When I was in China last winter, P. Paul explained to me why he studied Mandarin so diligently, spending hours a day learning new words and phrases from dictionaries and other people. He said that if you loved someone, you would want to learn their language so you could communicate with them. I know I've never been to Cambodia, or met any Khmers, so it may seem a bit uncomprehending that his statement would have any effect on me. Although I've never met anyone from Cambodia, I think that I've already developed a love for them. I feel a strong sense of sadness for those that do not yet know the gospel and an urge to share with them the good news so they do not have to suffer for eternity. I know that they are all my Father's children, and He loves them so much and cares for them. I believe that it was Him that placed a burden for the Khmers in my heart and it is through Him that I have come to care for them and love them despite having never met them.
I know that I probably won't be able to speak anything near fluent Khmer or have actual conversations in Khmer, but I believe that the little I would have learned would better equip me to communicate to the natives, reach out to them, show them that I love them and that they are so important, hence I'm learning their language. I know I am terrible at languages and pronunciations of accents, but I know that His grace is more than sufficient for me. And I know that His grace will help me to reach out to them and communicate with them, and maybe, through all of this, they might see His amazing love and might come be saved. After all, the language of love has no barrier. 
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| 1 more to go!
Since it's already officially Friday, that means 1 more day til I'm done with exams! And I'm done with Finance forever! I finished my Commerce degree as of Wednesday. I already feel like exams are over. Came home after Property, slept because I've had no sleep over this week, watched GG, had dinner and did practically nothing (apart from format my notes for Trusts - yes, I am particularly picky about my formatting, all the dot points and headings have to be at the right margins and right sizes...). Anyway, my Mimco shoes I've been looking for in every shop in Perth and Melbourne and on ebay and on their website that were sold out in the WHOLE of Australia are back in stores. I was tres excited. I discovered this yesterday in the library and practically squealed out loud in delight. I think the whole library heard me and I got a few weird looks. Mom was really happy for me and said she'd get them until she found out they were 3 inch wedges which are "impractical" and cost $300. Now I'm undecided whether I should get them because then I will have a lot less money for everything else.      | | |
| I am thankful for so much. For a wonderful support system; wonderful godly friends who encourage and pray for me and with me and bring me so much laughter despite being cooped up in the library all day, for an incredibly sacrificing and caring mother who goes to lengths to ensure that I have enough rest during exam period by doing my chores for me, writing me little notes and cooking for me at the strangest times, for Chelsea who's always up waiting for me when I get home from the library at the latest hours, and for the strength and grace from an all-powerful God to survive this mentally and emotionally demanding period and amazing peace despite the stressful conditions. First exam tomorrow. I will do my best. | | |
| The very same God that spins things in orbit
runs to the weary, the worn and the weak.
And the same gentle hands that hold me when I'm broken
They conquered death to bring me victory.
Today was a difficult day for me. Well, not all of it was bad. The afternoon was good cos we had people over for lunch and it was nice to hang out with everyone again but then it was study time at the library after. I was just getting so frustrated with myself because I wasn't understanding anything for AFM and worrying about the exam on Tuesday and how much everyone knew compared to me, and how everyone was "getting it" while I wasn't. I think all that just lead to me feeling very worn out and exhausted from this whole week of studying. I felt so lost and confused as to why I was having such difficulty grasping all the concepts and felt like giving up, thinking that there was no way I could learn the entire unit in two days. When I was at my wit's end, I decided to take a step back and just relax for a while, calm down and listen to some music. It was when Nicole C. Mullen's Redeemer was playing that I noticed the lyrics. And I just stopped worrying for a while and was in awe that the very same God who spins things in orbit, in His supremacy, would run to me when I'm weary and weak and worn out. He's such a big God that had conquered so much, surely nothing was too big for Him to handle. I guess I've never ever really struggled with studying and getting good grades much before, it all sorta just happened and I might have taken it all for granted. And right now I'm experiencing difficulties understanding this unit even after trying so hard, it was all very disheartening. But He taught me an important lesson today. That He is so much bigger than all my problems. And no matter what happens, I can still go to Him with all my troubles and He will give me peace. A peace that surpasseth all human understanding, that is impossible to comprehend or even grasp. And after reading Philippians 4, I was just overcome with this spirit that filled me with peace, despite having so much to worry about. For I know that everything is in His hands. All I can do is to give it my best shot, and leave the rest to Him. So, according to some I might have wasted the entire day not learning anything or doing anything productive. But I've learnt a far more valuable lesson today and I'm going to start with a new mindset tomorrow. And I will overcome this impossible unit. Thank You Lord | | |
| So I spent the whole day Monday in my room. I was going to go to the beach but decided against it. I tidied up my room. Well, arguably. It's messier now than it was before but only cos I had to take everything off the shelves and all my clothes off the hangers and dump them on the floor so I could start from scratch. I didn't quite finish so there's still a fair bit on the floor. Bits of it are neater though. I moved all my books from my book shelf and put them in on top of my wardrobe. And I put some of my more worthy shoes on the shelf. And I tidied up my dressing table. So now all I have to do is my wardrobe and find another shelf for my handbags (which Mom refuses to buy because she says handbags don't need shelves). While going through my clothes and accessories I found some old treasures that I haven't worn in ages and some I didn't even know I had. So I played dress up. With Chelsea of course. I also painted my nails the coolest shade of lavender. So all in all, I think I've accomplished quite a fair bit.
     Eau de Parfum collection (I think I collect them because of their pretty bottles, and their smell of course)  My Vogue collection dating back to 2004  Isn't she the most adorable thing ever? (Chelsea not Sheila)    The coolest shade of lavender thanks to Sportsgirl.  Orange (yes, orange) maxi dress from Miss Selfridge I haven't had a chance to wear yet but I'm in love with the print and texture, not so much the colour. (P.S. See Ange, I am not naked as you clearly thought I was)  Chandelier earrings from Sportsgirl that I used to wear ALL the time when I was 15 and the comfiest flowy Quirky Circus top.  Here I'm wearing my Country Road cream cropped jacket, an Alannah Hill silk and velvet skirt that I found in a sale 5 years ago (I think I bought it just because I wanted something from Alannah Hill and it was probably the only thing there I could afford), some random scarf and black patented leather heels from RMK.   I've been looking at the latest collections out and I am loving it. Tie-dye, shoulder pads, military jackets. I am especially loving Balmain's collection. I am absolutely coveting this jacket from their SS09 collection. It is amazing. Too bad it's last year's collection, Summer in Australia is waaaay too hot for jackets and more importantly, I would not be able to afford it.  One more day of uni for the year! And I'm done with my commerce degree. Only exams to go. After that 2.5 more years and I'll be done with uni forever. It's tres exciting. Caught up with Anita, Amy, Ari and Georgina today. It was really nice to see them all and see what they're all up to and doing next year. I forgot how much I laughed when I'm with them. I know this post is very self indulgent, but forgive me. I'll post on something more reflective soon. Promise. I'll write about world peace or something along those lines. xoxo | | |
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